2010 has brought about many revelations of how there are still so many things in my life that need to change. Realizing this has brought about a certain degree of trepidation and some sense of excitement about what the future holds for me. One year older, one year somewhat wiser. Wiser, in the sense that I have realized more deeply and thoroughly how I don't know anything! In many ways, I was surer of who I am and who I was when I was in my teens than I am now. I guess that's the thing that you realize as you get older. You're not as smart as you think you are. You're not as "all that" as you think you are. Reading the books for my leadership course has challenged me and convicted me of how I have to grow as a leader. Being in my Masters program made me realize that I'm not as gung ho about academia. The thought of doing a Ph.D. while I'm in my Masters makes me shudder. I'm slowly realizing more and more what I want to do with my life and that's always a good thing. It's taken me about 28 years to figure it out, but I guess, better late than never. lolz.
To a certain degree, I've also realized things about myself that I didn't realize before. I actually need and crave solitude amidst the overwhelming noise that I usually surround myself in. I spent a day with the Lord a couple of days ago and it was an amazing time of re-focussing and rejuvenation for my spirit. I've also had greater appreciation for friendships that I have built along the years. It's nice to have people know you for that long. It makes conversations way easier and real-er.
With a new year ahead of me, I'm looking forward to how I'm going to grow in such things as leadership and being servant-hearted. I'm not exactly the one who wants to serve. I want to be served. More and more, I realize what a detrimental attitude this has been in my life. Also looking forward to being more disciplined both physically and spiritually. Being really challenged to live a life that's totally and wholly abandoned to Christ, no matter what the cost.
and scene...
2 comments:
Hey sid,
Have you ever read, "The age of Reason" by Paine? If you have, I want to know your take on it.
If you haven't, please read it so I can discus it with you next September if it comes up.
i have not. i just put a hold on it from the library. i look forward to reading it and discussing it with you.
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